The following was posted to Facebook this morning by my wonderful and courageous daughter:
“So as usual I filmed a rough version of myself doing the number for tonight as a reference and to make sure key stuff looks good.
Maybe it’s that part of my wisdom is gone with the 4 teeth pulled or something, but in analyzing my proportions, I realized what I am now is less than what I thought I was at damn near 90 pounds, and still wasn’t happy.
In hindsight, I lost too much time to a disease that is too shamed upon and not fully recognized by society, yet all too common and strikes all genders, races, and ages. Back then I couldn’t see that I looked sick and terrible. I don’t even know how my now hubby saw anything in me when we met…appearance is nothing when it comes down to the physical wreck one puts their body through when faced with any type of eating disorder.
I look back on those years and think how I could have done better. Mistakes that would not have been made if I wasn’t consumed with said disease. But hitting rock bottom and powering through to a life not consumed by self destructive thoughts 24/7 has made me the strong woman I am today. A roll with the punches, fight for what I believe in, follow my dreams and screw the haters kinda gal. Without that struggle, I would not have the awesome things in my life right now that at my low times I tend to forget. Honestly, as my bandmates say, I have more than 9 lives because I’ve used up 20 at this point.
For those that stuck through this status, thank you. For those that are struggling with an eating/body image based disease or issue, I am a message away. Every now and then I go all preacher masokiss here on FB because I know someone, if only it be one single person, will read it and maybe get a tiny spark inside of them to fight to become healthy. It only takes one instance to go from feeling invincible to being damn near a death bed. Life is more than how you look, or how you THINK you look.
Live for the moment. Live for yourself. Fuck that negative voice in your head. Give a middle finger (or two) to the haters. #staystrong”